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Perak, Malaysia | Hradec Kralove, Czech

what i read

Karma by Muharikah | Book Review

June 11, 2020


Karma is the sequel of Stigma, written by the same author. This book was bought during previous BBW, and I somehow know that there will be another sequel (the last one) for this series, I decided to postpone reading it till Dilema comes out :) 

I can't imagine of waiting for Dilema after dealing with Karma. 

Karma by Muharikah | Book Review

Title: Stigma
Author: Muharikah
Pages: 419
Publisher: Iman Publication
Publication Date: March 2019


While Stigma introduced the main characters, Karma is more focus on the relationships between Dr Iman & Dr Faris who got married together and how they managed their relationship with their hidden history. Dr Iman as we all know, is the boss in the ward that Dr Faris works in so it is undeniable that Dr Iman has the dominant side of her as a leader. While Dr Faris is still fighting with his struggle, unfortunately both of them were surprised with sudden bad news - Dr Faris has a lymphoma! And turned out he is HIV positive too. Dealing with both situations, we can see how both of them trying their best to save the marriage, though I feel mixed feeling with the ending. T_T


Karma by Muharikah | Book Review

Based on online dictionary, 

"Karma - (in Hinduism and Buddhism) the sum of a person's actions in this and previous states of existence, viewed as deciding their fate in future existences." - https://www.lexico.com/en/definition/karma




Karma by Muharikah | Book Review
I love the quote :)


1. "Let the husband lead the family."
I am attracted to this part, maybe because I am still new in this relationship thingy, to be exact... approaching 10 months of marriage. Alhamdulillah. :)

Karma by Muharikah | Book Review


I got the feeling when Faris' position is below Iman at the hospital, but Faris is still Iman's husband to be respected. Point noted.

Well, if you guys have been reading the blog for a quite some time, I guess you can see how independent I can be... especially with those solo travels. Yeah, I can be dominant too. But, I think through out times, I prefer being the follower. :D No matter how I am able to do something at home, I will try my best to include my husband in the decision making so that nobody feels left out. InsyAllah!

2. "Medical service is about human act and human touch."
This is also another reminder to me as a health care worker :)

Karma by Muharikah | Book Review

I have love-hate feeling when attending patient as I can't help to feel annoyed every time I met some kind of cases / patients like:
  • accidents involving patients under 18, especially if they are not wearing helmet and do not even have license!
  • accidents involving drunkens!
  • patients who came in a worsened condition just because they ARE NOT COMPLIANT TO MEDICATIONS!
  • patients who came at 3 o'clock in the morning for something they already have for months and years and they don't even bother to get it checked before.
  • yada yada. Hahaha.

Banyak betul complaints. But, insyAllah for other cases, I am trying my best to give the best with the best attitude :)

Karma by Muharikah | Book Review
Aha... quite a number of cases that I have attended involving huge stress or poor management of it that lead to suicidal attempt - taking paracetamol in huge doses (for eg: telan Panadon 4 papan!), drinking Paraquat (herbicides to control weeds).


3. "Tidak ada karma dalam Islam."
"Yang ada adalah ketentuan dan takdir Allah yang telah diatur buat kepentingan manusia itu sendiri. Setiap perkara yang Allah takdirkan, sudah pasti ada kebaikannya, walaupun kita membencinya."


Karma by Muharikah | Book Review

In this novel, Iman feels like she has done too much sins that Allah is punishing her with lots of challenges. And I think this is the answer to the challenges :)

Karma by Muharikah | Book Review


4. Miracles

"Allah itu Maha Baik, kan kak? Setiap yang pergi, sudah pasti ada pengganti."

Faris passed away. He did not the survive despite completing the chemotherapy etc as the cancer has spread to the whole body. To be honest, this is such a sad new especially after the patient has consistently compliant to all appointments and medications - seems that the limit of our knowledge and ability given by Allah.

But, to know a good news after the sad one... is so refreshing :)

Karma by Muharikah | Book Review
Iman is pregnant!



My rating: ★★★★☆

SM, Perak, Malaysia
200611

Stigma by Muharikah | Book Review

June 10, 2020


I bought Stigma during a book fair if I am not mistaken and finished reading it at that time. Just because I recently bought the sequels of the novel which are Karma and Dilema, I decided to reread Stigma so that I don't have to get confused with the characters. :)

Okay, what can I say about Stigma?

Stigma by Muharikah | Book Review



Title: Stigma
Author: Muharikah
Pages: 351
Publisher: Iman Publication
Publication Date: April 2018


Maybe we can start with a rough synopsis?

The novel portrays a life story with a medical background; Dr Iman Syahirah is the main character in the story, a medical specialist (a.k.a general physician) in an infectious disease ward, Dr Faris, a medical officer who work together in the same ward. They are in charge of patients with HIV / AIDS and the story plays around this topic. 

Here come Dr Aleph, a cardiologist who ended up as Dr Iman's best friend. 

One thing that makes me excited (yet scared) - all of them have the same internal challenge - attracted to same gender but struggling to live a normal, blessed life.

Yeah, it is scary because it is uncommon for me to see people in medical fields who are LGBTQ and to be honest I am not sure how to react if I meet any. T_T There are some people that I know, but we are not that close... so that's it.




---------------------

I don't want to comment much on the story line as it really depends on the preference of readers. Some may say the story presentation is a bit dull as it contains quite a lot of medical stuffs, but I don't have much problem with it as I have that background too. Yet, the author already explained every terms she used. 

And maybe I am still a newbie with Malay novels, I find the book to be okay :)

So, as usual, what I love about doing book reviews is more towards what I have learned from the book hihi... let's go! :)



1. "Cuma Iman takut. Dalam dia menarik orang lain keluar dari kegelapan, mana tahu dia pula yang tenggelam di dalamnya."

This is when Iman shared with her best friend, Zarith after Iman met Aleph in a conference I think. Aleph is actually a lady whose appearance is like a guy, a gentleman. At that time, Aleph was actually attracted to Iman and trying to hit on her.... hehe okay kat sini rasa semacam kejap.

But what I like about both of them, they finally know about each others' past and struggles to change, even trying to support the process.

Stigma by Muharikah | Book Review

About the verses, to be honest, I don't much experience dealing with LGBTQ, but the verses sound so good, reminds me on how people afraid to get involved with people having bad issues because they are afraid if in case they got influenced to do the same.

Stigma by Muharikah | Book Review

Here, I am surprised to read that Faris furthered his studies in Jordan, while Iman in Egypt. Although they were in Islamic countries, they were still exposed to LGBTQ too. Maknanya, study negara Barat akan terdedah dengan budaya ni, rupanya di negara Arab sekalipun. Ahaa...


2. "The struggle is real."

This verse is quoted quite a lot through out the book.

When Iman trying to counsel her patients about changing the lifestyle, I realised people who are LGBTQ somehow know their preferences are wrong but at the same time, they also feel there's nothing can be done because they are born that way.

"Tapi, saya tak rasa saya ada pilihan pun, doktor! Dari kecil lagi saya suka kat lelaki. Saya dah cuba untuk suka perempuan! Saya memang tak boleh! Saya rasa geli!" - Johan

"Percayalah Johan. Kita semua ada pilihan. Cuma kita selalu biarkan nafsu dan perasaan buat pilihan untuk kita. I know, the struggle is real. Tapi yakinlah, jika awak benar-benar mahu berubah, Allah akan bantu awak." - Iman

From this conversation, I can imagine what if the advice given by Iman was actually given by someone else who is straight? The LGBTQ may even say that... "kau tak faham pun perasaan ni", in another word, we are saying out of empathy. Only if the patient know that the doctor herself was in the same shoes!

Anyway, yeah. Memang challenging untuk ubah nafsu. The feeling is real. The love. The preferences.

Stigma by Muharikah | Book Review


"Bukan hak kita untuk judge orang, Faris. Setiap orang tu pasti ada pengalaman silam dia. Ada trigger yang menjadikan mereka begitu. Ada seorang pesakit ni jadi gay sebab kena liwat dengan abang-abang senior sekolah asrama. Bila you dengar cerita mereka, you will understand and appreciate their struggles. Dari situ, awak boleh bantu mereka untuk berubah dan kembali kepada Allah." - Iman.


This makes me reflects a lot about my impression every time I met patients with known case of hepatitis, retroviral disease (RVD) etc. Some may even got the disease from husband / wife or even blood transfusion (though it is rare). We usually call them as 'biohazard patient', more towards our preparation to protect ourselves with PPE. 

Maksudnya, bila nak ambik darah, kena pakai double gloves - walaupun kalau nak ditakdirkan tercucuk, tercucuk jugak. Getah lawan jarum, siapa menang? T_T


3. "Hati kita ni, Allah yang punya. Serahkan hati kita kepada Allah."

"Dah lama saya tak dengar orang nasihatkan saya macam ni doktor. Dah lama juga saya tak jaga solat saya. Asyik tinggal saja." - Johan

" Jangan putus asa, Johan. Allah ada. Awak jaga solat, Allah akan jaga awak. Awak berdoa dan minta tolong pada Dia, Dia pasti akan bantu awak. Awak hanya perlu bersungguh-sungguh. Ingat ya, Johan? Hati kita ni, Allah yang punya. Serahkan hati kita kepada Allah." - Iman


This conversation also reminds me how important of our prayers. I can relate with my work too. Memang tiap-tiap kali nak pergi kerja, doa banyak-banyak semoga Allah bantu. Alhamdulillah, even though I feel a bit sad because I don't have much opportunities to work with female senior doctors, I feel blessed that most of the male seniors that I've been working with are VERY HELPFUL. I believe Allah is helping me through them - their knowledge and experiences. 


4. Umat Islam memang memerlukan ramai doktor pakar.

This hits me a lot. Huhuhu. Maybe because I am still contemplating of furthering studies or simply stay in this position till Allah knows when.

Stigma by Muharikah | Book Review

"Dulu, profesor saya pernah nasihatkan, dia cakap: pertama, tak ramai orang Muslim yang berjaya sempai ke peringkat tertinggi dalam perubatan. Kedua, bila kita nak treat pesakit kita, rasa lebih nikmat apabila kita tahu cara terbaik untuk merawat. Bayangkan jika kita tak ada ilmu perubatan, sedangkan mereka perlukan pertolongan. Bagaimana kita nak bantu?" - Iman

"Terakhir sekali dia kata, apabila dah jadi specialist, physically kita akan lebih banyak masa untuk luangkan dengan family kita. Cuma yang diperlukan adalah otak kita. Gaji pun bertambah, ada waktu hanyak perlu on call dari rumah sahaja." - Iman

Huhuhu....

Tapi nak sambung belajar balik tu... mashaAllah perasaan dia, serba salah betul. A lot of things need to be considered - money, place, family the most important. Based on my seniors sharing, ramai je yang bergolak rumahtangga bila ada yang sambung belajar. All need patience and understanding, right?


5. Dosa

"Dosa ini, pada awalnya memang kita rasa berat. Rasa gelap. Kita rasa sesal dan gelisah. Tapi, bila kita dah selalu buat, hati kita akan jadi gelap dari hari ke hari, sehingga kita tidak lagi merasai bahawa dosa itu satu dosa." - Ustazah Norhafizah

"Hati kita sudah desensitize dengan maksiat. Apa yang berlaku bila kita dah tak sensitif? Dosa tu jadi perkara biasa. Kita tak sedar dosa tu satu kesalahan. Apabla ada orang tegur, kita melenting. Apabila solat, kita dah tak rasa manis beribadah. Apabila baca Quran, kita susah nak menangis." - Ustazah Norhafizah

So true.



Stigma by Muharikah | Book Review


-----------

Generally, the content is actually heavy but I glad that Muharikah managed to tackle it and produce the product with a light read :) There are too many things we can learned from this novel, insyAllah. 
Good job, Muharikah :)

I can't wait to share my reviews on the sequels too :D

My rating: ★★★★☆

SM, Perak, Malaysia
200610

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